What comes to mind when you think about commitment?

Most people would probably think about an athlete that has reached incredible performance or an entrepreneur that is set on creating the best customer experience in the market. Maybe you thought about a person who is loyal to their loved one or someone who consistently follows a healthy diet and physical routine.

If we look in an online dictionary, we’d see that commitment is defined as
‘the state or quality of being dedicated to a cause, activity’.

Have you noticed how we use this term only in association with the things we say we desire or believe should desire?

I’m committed to success. (*whatever that means*).
I’m committed to making more money. (*but binging on Netflix sounds more fun*)
I’m committed to going to the gym. (*next Monday…a year from now*).
I’m committed to spending quality time with my partner. (*but let me check Instagram first*).
Is anybody guilty? Raise a hand, please!.

Oh and let’s not even get into the whole scenario where you become so judgemental for not meeting your own expectations. That’s a downward spiral, don’t go there! Just don’t, ok?
We live under the impression that commitment does not exist outside of the things we value as positive or desirable. But is it actually true?… You see, commitment is not something that you either have or don’t. You are always and I mean ALWAYS, committed to something.
The question is ‘What are you committed to?’.

You can be committed to success and still treat yourself like you don’t matter. You can be committed to making more money and still believe you’re not worthy of it. You can be committed to going to the gym and still have the same judgemental inner monologue about your body. You can be committed to spending more quality time with your partner and still function from ‘How do I get out of here?’. Do you see now why commitment is a double-edged sword?

Commitment is not about checking off everything on your to-do list. It’s not about following the magic formula that will generate the results you expect to get. It is about the person you BE when you are doing something. It’s your energy & subconscious patterns that run the show, but wait… who has time even looking at that when you are too busy distracting yourself with all the doing?

What you are being is the ultimate testimony of your commitment. Remember that!
If there’s something in your life or business that doesn’t go the way you’d like to, chances are you have an unconscious commitment going on.
A commitment to lack, scarcity, boredom, no choice, no possibility, and the list goes on. You wouldn’t create a single thing in your reality if you didn’t find some kind of value in it. You do it consciously and unconsciously.

I know, it might sound crazy… After all, what is the value of creating lack or scarcity or boredom or any of that ‘good stuff’?.
Here is where the human genius comes into play. We are so good at making all kinds of weird connections & selling ourselves crazy points of view that we end up blocking our awareness and capacity to actualize what we would actually like. Big time!

I’ll tell you a little story that will hopefully drive this point home.
Let’s imagine that Sally feels called to become a speaker and she wants to host live events down the line, knowing how much her message will contribute to the world. She is more of an introvert. Talking in front of a large group of people is pretty nerve-wracking. Sally’s been going to many courses to improve her communication, business, and leadership skills. She has a wall in her house full of certifications that she is really proud of. I bet you’ve never seen anything like it. You could say she’s committed to investing in herself and that’s amazing, but she is starting to feel a bit disheartened. I wonder why?! She still hasn’t taken any step towards booking a venue for her speaking event. Now she’s going into ‘Maybe I’m not cut out for this’, ‘Maybe sometime in the future’, ‘I’m not ready’, you know the drill.

As you can imagine, all that enthusiasm from the beginning has started to fade and is now replaced by a lack of inspiration, confidence, and drive. If that wasn’t enough, her current job is highly stressful, totally unrewarding, seriously underpaid and her co-workers?… My God, they look like serial killers if they don’t get a coffee at 10 am on the clock. Have I mentioned she has a new landlord that increased the rent by 10% and she’s short on money? Her cat died last week. Not that it matters too much to the story, but… I suppose by now you really feel for Sally. Let’s dissect this scenario, which, I think you agree, is pretty common.

Before I get into that, I have a surprise for you!. I am so excited to invite you to my Free Masterclass: ‘3 Powerful Shifts To Release Abundance Blocks’, where I talk about the 3 pillars I believe are fundamental to unlocking abundance in all areas of life. If you stay until the end of the masterclass, you’ll receive a copy of my E-book: ‘Become a Manifestation Powerhouse’ for free. People are loving it! If that speaks to you & you too are ready for radical transformation with your money, business, body, and relationships, then I would love to see you there. You can sign up here >>

 

Now, coming back to the story, you might ask…

Q: Why would Sally create a work situation like that? After all, she could easily find a better job considering how many certifications she has. She could do that while building her speaking career, right? What’s the value or hidden commitment in this?

A: The value she’s looking for is comfort. She has a hidden commitment to lack. What I didn’t mention in the story is that when she was little her parents moved around a lot, because of their jobs. She had to change schools so often that she never had a chance to build meaningful connections in one place. When she had to present herself in front of the class for the first time she’d get rosy cheeks & she’d stumble over her words, becoming more and more self-conscious. Kids always made fun of her for that. After every move, her parents would get more distant from one another, the money situation wouldn’t improve and Sally would only get more lonely & insecure. From a young age, she’s learned to associate big changes with big losses. Sally would much rather chose to settle for lack and dissatisfaction in the present moment than to make a change. Why? Because subconsciously she believes that would lead to worse situations. Is it logical in any way? No, of course not, but she has bought a point of view as true a long time ago & that point of view has been creating her reality since then. It’s like a self-fulfilling prophecy. Can you imagine how many painful memories would get triggered in her only by considering to start a career in speaking? Let alone to organize an event where you are the center of attention. The question remains…how do you shift that? The best way is to start asking more questions. This will open you up to new possibilities & it will expand your awareness.

Here is some questions/journal prompts you can start using today:

• • • If I had no point of view about (a situation, desire, person, etc.), then what else would be possible?

    • As an infinite being that has infinite choices, possibilities & resources, what do I get to be, do, have, know, perceive & receive right now?

    • If I had no past reference point, then what would I choose right now?

    • What can I be grateful for right now that I’ve never acknowledged before?

    • What can I be and do that will create the most dynamic change in my life?

I strongly encourage you to test this out for at least a week. I think you will be surprised to see how much things can change in a short period of time. Oh and don’t forget to sign up for the Free Masterclass: ‘3 Powerful Shifts To Release Abundance Blocks’, where I talk about the 3 pillars I believe are fundamental to unlocking abundance in all areas of life. If you stay until the end of the masterclass, you’ll receive a copy of my E-book: ‘Become a Manifestation Powerhouse’ for free. Here’s the link >>

 

Love, Toini Halle – Entrepreneur, Life & Business Coach